“Hi, I’m Lily. I’m painfully awkward and I embarrass myself on a daily basis”
I suffer from this condition commonly referred to as AWKWARDNESS and it has had a devastating impact on me and the life that I lead. I cannot seem to find it in me to behave normally in the general public and this has resulted in numerous embarrassing and painfully awkward situations.
My Top Ten Embarrassing Moments This Year : 2014
1. Playing air guitar and air drums in a lift (elevator) and having someone watch me do it. We write our tests on the fifth floor of the teaching building and being the lazy person that I am , I decided to skip the stairs and essentially take the easy way out. I was incredibly unfit and the thought of clambering up five flights of stairs was mortifying.
I, predictably, had my earphones on, Paramore‘s “Still Into You” (An Epic Song Of Note ) was blasting into my ears and my eyes were closed. I was facing the back of the lift and I was enthusiastically playing guitar in the air. I am an unaware at which point the other person made their entrance into the lift. When the lift (elevator) finally stopped at level five, I turned around only to discover one of my module chairs laughing at me hysterically ! My soul left my body !
2. Meeting a hot senior and being incredibly awkward. Yes LH7H , I’m talking about you.
3. Dancing like a madman after writing my Chemistry exam because I was deliriously happy ! No more stereochemistry , titration and damned Molecular Geometry and Bonding Theories ! ( If they throw in a surprise Chemistry block in final year, I will die of cardiogenic shock because Chemistry and I are done ! Our relationship has been terminated !)
4. Arguing with myself and having someone hear it. They asked me if I was ok. I don’t know if they were more concerned for me emotionally or mentally.
5. Sleeping for 3 hours in the library and drooling on the desk. I was really tired. All I can remember was putting my head down for a short nap and waking up hours later. I woke up flustered and mortified. Much like Dylan O’Brien .
6. Pretending to be on my phone to avoid talking to someone . Then my phone actually rang. ( I wanted to die right there !)
7.Dancing to my ringtone before answering my phone. My ringtone is Say My Name by Odesza and Zyra ( Go soundcloud them now and prepare to love it ! !)
8.Perving over a Student Intern out loud. Loud enough for them to hear me and look in my direction. And Smile. (Thank goodness they graduate in a year’s time – i’ll just have to avoid bumping into that intern until the end of second year )
9. Getting lost in the anatomy building whilst looking for a bathroom and accidentally taking the lift to the basement where they store and prepare the cadavers. Danse Macabre ( I’m a huge Saint-Saëns fan :)) started playing in my head !
I have never been more terrified than I was then ! It was so eerie ! I started to think about the Corpse bride (Creepiest movie ever !) and imagined that a cadaver would come to life just as Emily had !
An old and scary man popped out from nowhere and shouted at me because I was in a restricted area. My legs have never moved with as much speed as they did on that macabre morning!
10. Walking into a lecture hall full of seniors and having to do the awkward backward shuffle and nearly tripping.
#QueenOfSmooth #LilyIsSuchALady #HidesFaceForEternity #WhyLilyWhy #INeedToStopHashTagging 😛
Lots Of Lily Love ❤ (LOLL)