This past week has been a myriad of emotions for me. I’ve gone from being the poster-girl for cheerfulness and elation to extremely sad , angry and depressed and every other emotion that lies between those extremes.
I spent the majority of my day yesterday in a dejected mood. I received a notification regarding the deaths of a fourth year medical student from my campus and her younger sister in an accident in their home town. I did not know her personally.
Those who knew her say she was an intelligent and gifted student who always spread joy amongst those around her. It has affected me more than I think is normal. My mother had to offer me words of comfort to calm me down. It made me sad because she had so much that lay ahead for her. Her future was very bright and to have it cut off in an accident seems unjust. She had a prosperous future ahead of her.
I am angry that they had so little time. I’m depressed because it makes no sense. Not to me and certainly not to the people who need the most closure in their lives, their family. How does one come to terms with losing two people that they love ? My condolences to their friends and family who are probably experiencing this pain severely.
The concept of death is, at this point of my journey , still foreign.There is a finality.A cessation. A “nail- on- the- door”- type of feeling. There is nothing more that can be done and to be entirely honest, that scares me. I do hope that I am able to find helpful coping mechanisms in my years in training.
Her url might have to change though 😉 She has been a constant source of motivation and inspiration for me this past year. Her wonderful blog played a part in me embarking on my blogging journey. She is a cool human and I know that she will do fantastic things to make this world a better place.
It is my hope that in five years time, I too will be a doctor so that I can join the worthy cause of saving people’s lives. I feel emboldened to finish the rest of my degree with vigour and energy. I hope to retain this feeling until the end of my academic career.
Lily in love ❤
Lots of Lily Love ❤ (LOLL)